Unhappiest Place On Earth: Bad Parenting Ruins The Magic

While cruising the world wide web this week I stumbled across a small, yet post-inspiring article. On October 20th, a five-year-old autistic boy visiting Nickelodeon Universe at the Mall of America was separated from his parents, climbed a fence, and got onto a roller coaster track. Fortunately, he was rescued by an employee before any harm could come to him at the hands of the speeding coaster train. Lost children are not an uncommon phenomenon in any crowded public space. In fact, an article from Indy's Child Parenting Magazine found a report which "noted that over a 12-month period, more than 27 percent of all families that visited an amusement park lost one of their children while they were there—that's one out of every three children." And that was only counting reported incidents, who knows how many small isolated missing children crisises happen unreported. Not all of these incidents can be attributed to poor parenting. Angie Wagner at LoraineCountyMoms.com confirms that even the best laid plans for child safety can go awry, however, I am of the belief that the majority of lost child incidents are due to some negligence on the part of a parent or guardian. Although losing a child for a few minutes is not the worst thing in the world, it is part of a much more disturbing trend, an almost unavoidable plague that affects every theme park trip at some point: poor parenting and the disgusting behavior exhibited by rude children and their clueless parents. These crimes against the courteous theme park goer can ruin the fun for everyone around them. It baffles and disturbs me how often I have witnessed displays of human disregard and sometimes cruelty on my visits. Despite being places of joy, excitement, and family bonding, theme parks often bring out the worst in people.

There is no more obvious place where this abhorrent behavior is displayed than in the queue. The afternoon sun on a crowded summer weekend can do funny things to people in a one hundred-minute switchback line wait for a three-minute ride experience. This is the breeding ground of the most heinous theme park crimes, the most common and least serious of which is line cutting. A series of moms with four-year-olds hanging off them squeezing by offering the justification of "my husband is just up ahead" is enough to drive one insane. Spot saving is unacceptable theme park behavior and it teaches children that they are better than all who have waited appropriately and put in the time to get the reward of the ride at the end of the line. This is merely an annoyance though, the behavior can get much worse. Some parents seem to be driven to the brink of lunacy by their restless children while waiting in lines. In a recent blog post, Children Go Ape Shit for Nemo, Eric Ambler writes about an hour long battle he witnessed between a mother and her continually wondering off four-year-old in line. At one point during this incident the mother literally crams Cheerios into the child's mouth and moves his mouth in a chewing motion. In another instance he describes a "grotesque" game of tug-of-war in which the mother tries to pull her toddler off of a guard rail he is clinging too. When they finally got to the attraction, the child fell asleep during the ride. This incident proves that it might be smart for a parent to research an attraction and consider their child's age while weighing the cost of the wait time versus entertainment value before offering a "grotesque" display of poor parenting and fellow line mate disregard.

By far the most disgusting behavior I have witnessed in theme park lines are what I will call the "my ride" parents (pictured, left). Mike Collins offers an excellent description of a "my ride" parent incident in his recent post, Tales from Orlando: A Mother Worse Than the Yeti, on the Coaster Radio Blog. He describes a situation in which a mother's selfish desire to go on a thrill ride is more important than her child's fear of the ride while showing complete disregard for the hundreds in line with them. For an hour the mother dragged her screaming and kicking child through the line and at one point yells at her child "YOU ARE NOT GOING TO RUIN MY RIDE!!!" This is just sick. Not only is this an abhorrent way for a mother to act toward her child, but it surely made the hour wait extremely unpleasant for everyone around them. Collins jokingly suggests that theme parks should offer child protective services, I agree, and not in a joking sense. Most parks do offer a parent swap service where one adult goes on the ride while one stays with the child and then they swap. I would encourage parents to use this service if they really want to go on a ride, or simply not go on the ride at all. Child torture of this kind reprehensible and should be illegal. Not only does a display like this ruin the experience for those in line, but it is a quick way to show everyone how horrible of a parent you are.

Though queues are often the site of the most frequent and disturbing incidents, terrible behavior can usually be seen all over. Everything from stroller road rage to parents unwilling to remove their crying child from a show can put a damper on a theme park visit. I have had people stand directly in front of me at a show while I was in a wheelchair. I witnessed a child being carried by a father kick a man in the head and the father never gave a second glance back. I have experienced countless line cuts and parents yelling and hitting their children (and vise-versa). And it gets worse the longer the vacation. Author Dawn Meehan theorizes in a post on her blog, Because I Said So, that bad behavior increases steadily with each consecutive day spent at a theme park. How can it be that places of fun so often turn into a battle ground? What happened to those nice vintage 1960's families in their matching sweaters and Mickey ears? The simple argument is that parenting has just gone down hill the last few decades producing rude, ungrateful, selfish, and spoiled children who expect everything. I think this argument is too easy. Although I am sure that this is a valid cause of many theme park criminals, I believe that the rising costs of vacations is also a major contributor to unacceptable behavior. Between 1980 and 2008 the cost of one day admission to a Disney park increased from eight dollars to seventy-five dollars. When people pay a lot they expect a lot. They want to get their money's worth by cramming as many attractions in as possible and if things are not going perfectly they are easily upset. Disappointment is inevitable when expectations are so high. There is a reason why one of the most common things yelled by a parent to their child is, "Do you know how much this vacation costs?!" I believe this is why theme parks can bring out the worst in people. To the perpetrators of these crimes, I would suggest resting when one is tired especially with young children, enjoy the moment without anticipation of the next thing, remember that not everything will go perfectly, and realize that most people paid the same amount for their admission and deserve a respectful environment. If anything, common courtesy should be more present because everyone is there to have a good time and it is really the atmosphere of happiness and fun that makes theme parks special. It kills me to see horrid behavior at the places that I love. Sadly, this behavior will never being eliminated, but maybe it can be kept to a minimum with a little more respect on behalf of the theme park goers everywhere. Perhaps I am nostalgic for a McCarthyian family fantasy (pictured, right) that has never existed, but I just want everyone to be happy, respectful, and have a good time.